New years. Goals. Resolutions. However you look at it, we are bombarded by :What’s your 2018 resolution? Me, I’m not that big on NY resolutions. Mainly because I have seen in my own life and my clients’ how they can easily set you up to fail.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m a planner. I love strategy and I pretty much already know what my year is going to focus on.
However – the reason that most ‘NY resolutions’ fail, is because they are not real goals.
They are just ‘should’s’ camouflaged as real goals. People feel they ‘should’ get healthier, find a new job, improve a relationship, learn a new language, but these are just tick boxes for most people.
Not real desires.
Goals – are dreams with deadlines. If your goal isn’t backed up with a real desire, then it’s just going to roll around again come January 2019 getting you no where closer to where you want to be.
For you to actually change or create a habit in your life takes 62 days.
Starting is easy. But, being consistent – and showing up for yourself day after day, that’s when the rubber hits the road. That’s when the real work starts - when the momentum stops.
Recently, I decided to start running again – after a about a 6 month hiatus. This one commitment revealed to me 6 steps that helped me get my running MOJO back. And, these steps can help you get clarity on ANY goal you have declared for yourself for the new year.
After all, there’s no point in wasting another minute thinking about learning to knit if you are just doing it because the gals at work are into it. When you get clear on what you really desire to achieve, that’s when the real transformation takes place.
When I was totally out of my running MOJO, these 6 steps helped me get back to my goal, and take real action:
1. Ask yourself WHY? Why did I want to run again? I used to love running. It was ‘my time’, and something I didn’t have to overly plan for and I could do it solo or socially. It made me more of ME. So, instead of saying ‘I am running again because I want to be healthier’ – I told myself : ‘I want to run again because I feel amazing about life and become more of ME when I do it. It’s ME time’. Getting real about the pay-off was a game-changer for me to actually start making it part of my routine again. Make sure you have an emotional connection to your WHY and you’ll always come back it.
2. Start from love, not hate. ‘You make it sound like a punishment’. One of my business friends said this to me when I told her I was about to go ‘kill myself in a running session’. I realised my language around this exercise was seriously negative. Of course I didn’t want to go run if the way I talked about it was like I was dreading a dental visit. Whatever you desire to commit to, make sure it’s coming from a loving place. Instead of ‘I have to run even though I am crap at it’ I changed it to ‘I’m going for a run because I love how it makes me feel. I love that I get to be alone, exercise and listen to my favourite podcast un-interrupted’.
3. Commit to it. Once I make the commitment to myself, I back it up. With a new running app, running clothes and a dedicated time in my calendar. I even bought a running book and started posting my runs on social media. No, none of these things were necessary but they helped me stay committed. Words without action mean nothing. When you write down a goal you are 3 times more likely to make that happen.
4. Start where you are at. It’s easy for me to say this to clients about starting businesses or starting a new venture – yet, sometimes it can be overwhelming if you desire to run a marathon but you can barely run around the block without wanting to collapse. Tiny steps add up to a climb up the mountain – so be gentle with yourself. As long as you are making progress – ANY progress is leading you to success – and you are totally whipping people sitting on the couch and complaining about their life, job, business without doing anything about it. Run around the block. Then go a little further. Repeat. Do this in running and life – and you’ll end up at the finish line sooner then you thought.
5. Be accountable to something. A coach, a mastermind partner, a job, a bribe for yourself – when you declare your intention, give yourself REAL accountability. There is NO way I would have kept showing up for myself if I didn’t have people reminding me and asking me about what I was doing and if I was still running. My husband even bought me flowers to keep encouraging me to keep running.
6. Make it joyful. If you don’t include or manufacture joy in the process – you. Will.quit. This is true in running as it is in life and business. If you don’t enjoy what you are doing – find a way to bring joy into it. How? I have my running music and podcasts that I only listen to while I run, it brings me a lot of fun and distraction. In my business, I often go to a nice hotel or coffee shop so I can enjoy being in a high vibe place while getting work done. Joy doesn’t need to come ‘after’ you complete your goal – it’s essential to the process. Whatever you have to do, ask yourself: how can I do it joyfully? Trust me, it’s a game changer.
Whether it’s running, a business goal or life change – make sure you look at 2018 as an opportunity to start with what you truly desire to accomplish this year, and not just tick some ‘resolution’ boxes that you have no real interest in fulfilling.
Real freedom and real transformation is just one thought (or run) away. Make it count this year.